The Garfield Network
by ShakespeareHemmingway
Summary: Garfield teaches Mark Zuckerberg about life love, and the ladies! Based partially on The Social Network Movie!


The Garfield Network

It was a Thursday and Mark Zuckerberg and Eduardo were trying to create Facebook.

"Mark Zuckerburg this is awful we cannot make the Facebook ourselves we are too much pathetic." Cried Eduardo like a baby losing his bottle.

"I know we will never get the popularity and the girls and the women without Facebook we are ruined." Squealed Mark Zuckerburg like little girl in the sandbox.

While Mark Zuckerberg and Eduardo were crying like babies about their failures, there was a sudden boom from the entrance of their dorm. Rockn heavy metal music played as a manly Orange figure with a hot sexy Asian lady in each muscular arm strolled in like a real man only can.

"Look there is Garfield, the manliest man on campus and the world! Only he can make the Facebook!" Shouted Eduardo with jubilee.

"Yes we must ask him at once for sake of popularity. "Said Mark Zuckerberg with gleam in his eyes. Mark Zuckerberg and Eduardo approached Garfield with urgency to ask him of help only he can give.

"Garfield we must make the Facebook. Please help us! Only your manly hands can make it." Begged Eduardo with crying shame.

"Yes Garfield please. You can have all money you desire." Said Mark Zuckerburg taking out money and offering it to Garfield with open hand.

Garfield stared at sissy boys with raging eyes and glared at the money. Garfield then grabbed the dollar bills in clenched fist and shoved it in Mark Zuckerbergs mouth.

"I have no need for your filthy money. I have one price and one price alone and that is Lasagna." Garfield said with stern justice.

"Very well Garfield. We will give you all lasagna you desire." Said Eduardo with promises.

"So be it. I will make your Foolbook." Declared Garfield with scoffing tone.

Garfield went to computer and typed words in and in 2 minutes made Facebook.

"Garfield! You did it. You made the Facebook!" Shouted Mark Zuckerberg in joy.

"Of course. It was easy like lady in my hands." Garfield remarked with casualness.

"Now I will be having my price." Garfield said with demands.

"Yes here is your first installment of Lasagna." Said Eduardo bringing in wagon of Lasagna.

"This will do for now. I will be seeing you laters." Garfield said as he left with his earned lasagna.

"We did it. Soon popularity will be ours." Said Eduardo with joy.

"Yes, soon all the sexy women will be ours. But now it is time for bed. I will see you in the morning." Said Mark Zuckerberg with yawning.

"Yes Good night dear friend and comrade." Eduardo said while heading to his room for bed.

Later at Midnight while Mark Zuckerburg was in bed he heard noise coming from window. He looked up and saw shadowy figure at his bed. Mark Zuckerberg turned on the light revealing the figure to be Justin Timberlake!

"Greeting Mark Zuckerburg it is I Justin Timberlake. I have heard of your success of Facebooks." Justin Timberlake said with sinister voice.

"Yes I have finally succeeded with help of Eduardo and especially Garfield." Said Mark Zuckerberg with truth.

"Forget Eduardo and Garfield. Come with me. Together we can steal Facebook and take over the world and the beautiful women and sexy ladies." Justin Timberlake offered with temptations.

"Yes you are right. Together all of things will be ours for the taking!" Shouted Mark Zuckerburg with selfish evil.

With these words, Justin Timberlake and Mark Zuckerberg stole the Facebook and escaped out of window.

Hearing commotions Eduardo checked in on Mark Zuckerburg to see if all was well. When Eduardo looked he saw Mark Zuckerberg was missing and so was Facebook.

"Oh no Mark Zuckerburg and Justin Timberlake stole Facebook!" Cried out Eduardo in panic.

Eduardo ran into Garfields room where Garfield was sitting in a hot tub with more ladies than he could count and Eduardo could count high.

"What is the insolence you stupid boy?" Garfield roared with outrage.

"Garfield it is horrible. Mark Zuckerberg and Justin Timberlake stoke the Facebook. You must stop them!" Cried Eduardo with tears of desperation.

"Those worms. I will make them into orange juice and squeeze them dry." Garfield Declared with gritted teeth and clenched fist.

"But where could they be? It is too late!" Said Eduardo with hopelessness.

"No they are on roof looking for escape." Garfield said as he hopped in his Red Corvette to look for searching.

"I will bring justice to them like the milkman brings milk, bottled and without mercy." Garfield said as he put the gear on max and blasted his Black Sabbath: Mob Rules album.

Meanwhile Justin Timberlake and Mark Zuckerberg were plotting escape.

"Mark Zuckerburg you go and get the helicopter I will wait here for you." Said Justin Timberlake.

"Very well. Soon Facebook and the world will be ours!" Mark Zuckerberg said as he ran off to get the helicopter.

Soon after Mark Zuckerberg left, Justin Timberlake saw something in the distance. It was Garfield in his Red Corvette blasting Classic rockin Black Sabbath and rearing for action! Justin Timberlake began to run but was chased down by Garfield to the edge of the roof.

"You can run but you cannot hide from hammer of justice." Said Garfield as he strolled out of his Red Corvette pointing at Justin Timberlake with finger of flaming fury.

Justin Timberlake threw himself at Garfield begging for mercy.

"Garfield please spare me. I am sorry for stealing Facebook. I will give you all the money in world. Please spare me." Begged and sobbed Justin Timberlake with sniveling words.

Garfield glared at Justin Timberlake with burning cat eyes.

"Spare the rod spoil the FOOL." Roared Garfield as he picked up Justin Timberlake holding him high into air. Then a mighty thunderbolt came from the sky and hit Justin Timberlake while he was in Garfields hands, thundering him with lightning.

"Here is your foolbook enjoy its money in hell." Garfield said as he tossed the thundered Justin Timberlake off the roof.

Soon Garfield heard a helicopter noise, and saw Mark Zuckerberg in an Apache helicopter rearing for battle.

"It is too late Garfield. Facebook will be mine and everyone will love me! All the sexy women will throw themselves at me! Now be prepared for missiles!" Said Mark Zuckerberg as he readied his rockets.

"You are FOOL! Facebook is for infants and impotents! Now face death by my manly fists!" Garfield bellowed with fierce justice.

Mark Zuckerburg fired his rocket missiles but Garfield caught them in his mighty hands.

"Friend this." Said Garfield as he tossed the missiles at Mark Zuckerbergs Apache helicopter sending him crashing into the street. Garfield went down to examine the wreckage when he saw a sexy young lady run out into the street.

"I am Mark Zuckerbergs Ex-Girlfriend. I am glad you defeated Mark Zuckerburg. He was a big jerk. Now the world is free and we can rejoice." Said Mark Zuckerbergs Ex-girlfriend in glee.

"Sure thing sexy sox. Come with me and I will show you true power of social networking." Garfield said with sassy seduction.

"Garfield you are like man I never met, please take me." Said Mark Zuckerbergs ex-girlfriend.

Garfield grasped Mark Zuckerbergs ex-girlfriend with his muscular arms and brought her to his love pad for some serious romance.

"I will ride your cyber highway and network you in ways you never imagined." Roared Garfield as he pleasured Mark Zuckerbergs ex-girlfriend with full force loving.

"Please Garfield. Make me a woman of the future with your cyberloving." Screamed Mark Zuckerbergs ex-girlfriend as she let herself be pleasured by Garfields awesome might.

Garfield and Mark Zuckerbergs girlfriend made sweet sweet love makings all night. All of the campus heard their love into hours of the morning as they rocked eachothers worlds.

The End…?


End file.
